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kormanticDo I think this was a ridiculously terrible movie? Oh yes. Did I enjoy it anyway? Given that M. Pants and I discussed it for hours afterwards, puzzling over the strange line readings and cracking up about the bizarre reactions of all the players and the yawning plot holes, I can honestly say I did.
But, seriously, as visually stunning as this film is, it is not good. At all. Well. Okay, Fassbender rules, but. Still.
Here is a spoiler-free, elegantly minimalist summation of the film:
Here is a bag of dicks!
Choke on them.
Literally.
PROMETHEUS
Charlize Theron, while icy, actually seemed refreshingly non-evil, and also the only practical person on the entire ship. Possibly she is also the only member of the crew who understands what "quarantine" means. Note to self: when planning an interstellar expedition, maybe make sure everyone gets a leaflet with the basics of space exploration. 1) When on an alien planet, never take off your helmet. 2) Maybe tell the other people you are on the trip with what you plan to do when you arrive there. In advance.
(from a review via Boing Boing)
When M. Pants and I discussed it later, I brought up that chestnut about actors always asking about their motivation in a given scene, and how only Charlize Theron and Geologist bothered with that bit.
Charlize Theron: "I fucking HATE my dad!"
Geologist: "I fucking LOVE rocks!"
Everyone else took an incomplete in that course.
Because Bitchface Holloway was all surly and drowning his sorrows because he ONLY FOUND PHYSICAL EVIDENCE OF ALIEN LIFE, and couldn't, you know, chat with them in person. Because that's something archaeologists get to do all the time.
Noomi Rapace wasn't so much a heroine as an incredibly hardy survivor, with a real no-nonsense approach to pro-choice DIY surgery, and the most efficient adrenaline rush I've ever seen. She was perfectly nice, otherwise, though. She did seem to be genuinely excited about touring space and learning scientific secrets and experimenting on alien life forms. Because again, archaeology and xenobiology are the same thing.
Idris Elba was charming as hell, but didn't seem especially bound by any sense of responsibility toward his crew. When he learns that two team members are stuck in a cave due to a storm, his demeanor is remarkably casual. It is my belief that he hoped the two (male, pointlessly bickering) scientists would huddle together for warmth and then work out their antipathies with sex and then, naturally, fall in love.
David, the only character they gave us any time to actually learn to like, spent all his time saying "I don't have emotions," in an incredibly ironic way. Fassbender was my favorite thing about the movie, aside from the visuals (David carefully dyeing his roots - best. thing. ever.)
Meanwhile, Ridley Scott is all "yay existential nihilism!", the end.
heh.
Meanwhile, I read a Washington Post review of Brave that had this to say:
"After beginning in thrilling fashion, “Brave” turns rather silly and slapsticky rather quickly, as if it were aimed mainly at the little kids in the audience rather than the whole family, for whom most Pixar movies are so satisfying and quite often moving... This time, the usual depth of story and well-developed characters simply aren’t there. It’s a pleasant diversion but, comparatively, a disappointment."
The only disappointing thing about the film was the soundtrack.
Otherwise, I think the movie is a lovely exploration of mother-daughter relationships and that it could only be "disappointing" if you are expecting a traditional hero's journey. This story has something to offer girls who are about to enter their fractious teens, and the real take away from this for families viewing it is that: individuals should be respected and communication is paramount. Her training and skill as a "boy" (physical feats as a rambunctious person with a bow and arrow) serve her well when she uses that skill to rescue herself from a marriage she doesn't feel ready for (and may never want). But that rescue comes in the first 15 minutes of the movie, allowing for a maturing of her relationship with her mother, and the two of them getting new perspectives on the wants and needs of the other. Kind of like Freaky Friday but better.
I like this movie because both parents are alive (woo!) and care and support and train her. I like that there is no romantic interest for the heroine. I like it still more because the mother gets to be heroic, and the daughter gets to use the skills she's learned from her mom (her training as a "princess"/girl) in statesmanship and public speaking and diplomacy to defuse political tensions.
That she does this prepared to offer herself (her personal sense of identity, certainly her independence) as her mother originally wished her to is a little upsetting actually, but her mother realizes that they can write their own rules, and reminds her of that before she marries for the sake of peace, rather than love.
Since most kids won't have to shoot an arrow at a critical juncture to rescue themselves or their loved ones, I think a more practical lesson that will reverberate in day-to-day life is kind of a nice change, actually.
But, seriously, as visually stunning as this film is, it is not good. At all. Well. Okay, Fassbender rules, but. Still.
Here is a spoiler-free, elegantly minimalist summation of the film:
Choke on them.
Literally.
PROMETHEUS
Charlize Theron, while icy, actually seemed refreshingly non-evil, and also the only practical person on the entire ship. Possibly she is also the only member of the crew who understands what "quarantine" means. Note to self: when planning an interstellar expedition, maybe make sure everyone gets a leaflet with the basics of space exploration. 1) When on an alien planet, never take off your helmet. 2) Maybe tell the other people you are on the trip with what you plan to do when you arrive there. In advance.
"The crew is gathered. Two of the chaps at the front are betting that it’s a terraforming expedition. Apparently they don’t know why they’re here either. You’d think they’d shown a little curiosity when, for instance, they were packing and saying goodbye to their loved ones. Or climbing on board the ship. Or going into suspended animation. But no.
“Where are you going darling?”
“Ha ha. Fuck knows. I imagine I’ll find out sooner or later. Or not. Who cares?”
“When are you coming back?
“Ha ha. I’m coming back?”
Charlize Theron walks in, says hello to the people she hired personally, and then introduces herself to everyone else. Seriously? They hadn’t done the meet and greet before they got on board the SBS? Ok. Fine. Just leave it then."
(from a review via Boing Boing)
When M. Pants and I discussed it later, I brought up that chestnut about actors always asking about their motivation in a given scene, and how only Charlize Theron and Geologist bothered with that bit.
Charlize Theron: "I fucking HATE my dad!"
Geologist: "I fucking LOVE rocks!"
Everyone else took an incomplete in that course.
Because Bitchface Holloway was all surly and drowning his sorrows because he ONLY FOUND PHYSICAL EVIDENCE OF ALIEN LIFE, and couldn't, you know, chat with them in person. Because that's something archaeologists get to do all the time.
Noomi Rapace wasn't so much a heroine as an incredibly hardy survivor, with a real no-nonsense approach to pro-choice DIY surgery, and the most efficient adrenaline rush I've ever seen. She was perfectly nice, otherwise, though. She did seem to be genuinely excited about touring space and learning scientific secrets and experimenting on alien life forms. Because again, archaeology and xenobiology are the same thing.
Idris Elba was charming as hell, but didn't seem especially bound by any sense of responsibility toward his crew. When he learns that two team members are stuck in a cave due to a storm, his demeanor is remarkably casual. It is my belief that he hoped the two (male, pointlessly bickering) scientists would huddle together for warmth and then work out their antipathies with sex and then, naturally, fall in love.
David, the only character they gave us any time to actually learn to like, spent all his time saying "I don't have emotions," in an incredibly ironic way. Fassbender was my favorite thing about the movie, aside from the visuals (David carefully dyeing his roots - best. thing. ever.)
Meanwhile, Ridley Scott is all "yay existential nihilism!", the end.
heh.
Meanwhile, I read a Washington Post review of Brave that had this to say:
"After beginning in thrilling fashion, “Brave” turns rather silly and slapsticky rather quickly, as if it were aimed mainly at the little kids in the audience rather than the whole family, for whom most Pixar movies are so satisfying and quite often moving... This time, the usual depth of story and well-developed characters simply aren’t there. It’s a pleasant diversion but, comparatively, a disappointment."
The only disappointing thing about the film was the soundtrack.
Otherwise, I think the movie is a lovely exploration of mother-daughter relationships and that it could only be "disappointing" if you are expecting a traditional hero's journey. This story has something to offer girls who are about to enter their fractious teens, and the real take away from this for families viewing it is that: individuals should be respected and communication is paramount. Her training and skill as a "boy" (physical feats as a rambunctious person with a bow and arrow) serve her well when she uses that skill to rescue herself from a marriage she doesn't feel ready for (and may never want). But that rescue comes in the first 15 minutes of the movie, allowing for a maturing of her relationship with her mother, and the two of them getting new perspectives on the wants and needs of the other. Kind of like Freaky Friday but better.
I like this movie because both parents are alive (woo!) and care and support and train her. I like that there is no romantic interest for the heroine. I like it still more because the mother gets to be heroic, and the daughter gets to use the skills she's learned from her mom (her training as a "princess"/girl) in statesmanship and public speaking and diplomacy to defuse political tensions.
That she does this prepared to offer herself (her personal sense of identity, certainly her independence) as her mother originally wished her to is a little upsetting actually, but her mother realizes that they can write their own rules, and reminds her of that before she marries for the sake of peace, rather than love.
Since most kids won't have to shoot an arrow at a critical juncture to rescue themselves or their loved ones, I think a more practical lesson that will reverberate in day-to-day life is kind of a nice change, actually.
